-My Gita tells me that evil can never result from good action- (Gandhi)

When I am taught me not to kill or slaughter anyone even for the sake of the name of my religion itself,

I know I cannot also belittle and diminish others for the difference we have.

When I am taught there is actually no me and you, but it’s about I see me in you, and I see you in me,

I just know that my-religion and your-religion just make illusionary boundaries and interrupt peace.

The stand is that peaceful mind is the way to built our heart while sideling the non-us is the way to built wall in us.

A simple part I have written months back when suddenly the understanding strike me.

I write this in tribute to Gandhi with his annivessary of birth on 2nd Oct.

Not writing an autobiography of the Father of India, but anyone will see him the manifestation of peace beyond the boundary of religion and their background.

 

 

As I hope this land will always be bless with peace and harmony…

May all be well and happy!!

To Remember the Dead is to Care the Living

As it is written when I was still back in Kedah then….

Tomorrow morning, I will be leaving Kedah, thus ending my 4 days here.

I can still remember the days me and my cousin jumping on my grandfather’s bed and wrestle on each other.

At that time, I used to get asthma attack, after the play, I always have difficulty in breathing, so I immediately get out from the room and immediately sit down quietly beside my grandfather to watch TV before I continue again after that.

As for the later days, I enjoy cycling around the Malay village here using my Grandpa Antique Japanese Bicycle. I enjoy the friendliness and simple lifestyle around the neighbourhood, that I got so much chance to reflect a lot on the actual way to happiness is simply contentment.

Every time I am going to return back to Penang, my Grandfather will put up the same line that is to stay longer.

I can’t forget the way both my grandparents stood outside and wave back as we make our way home.

Not to forget, my Grandpa will force me to accept some Ringgits before I go back, as I will usually reject by saying my parents would not be happy if I take it, and he will raise his voice more this time asking me to keep it.

This time around, the same thing seems to happen. But, maybe a difference is I will get one lesser goodbye wave from my Grandma.

The 2 most important woman in my life

When my Grandmother still take control to the home kitchen, I will say that her home-made Char Siew Pau, Huan Chu Pau (Potato Bun) and her Chai Kueh are the best.

In the pain on her knee for many years, even the Dr must not have found out that here best pain reliever was to roll the dough and folding the dumplings for her grandchildren every time we return.

A dedicated and always be remembered Grandmother

I can’t thank God more for giving me the chance to take care of her in her last few years.

I won’t know if it has been my best, but if I am given another chance, I will still secretly hold her cold clammy wrinkled skin when she is sleeping and to accompany her when she always trusted me to hold her walking aid while she try to lift herself up and walk a few rounds around the house.

I always miss holding her hand to walk on her aid

Por Por once said, “Study well, don’t let your parents down, when you be a doctor, I might not be around anymore”. I always gave a quick reply not because the words didn’t get into me, I just do not want her to see my true-self how much I fear and sad I am if it is true.

This month mark her 1 year since she leave, I just hope to collect more good Karma for her to earn a better place in her after-life as much as she deserve.

Those who have left, accept it. Those who are still living, appreciate them.

I can’t miss the phone call to my Grandfather every Friday.

Though the conversation is usually with the same question, but I know it is different, that is that single day you still have them listening to you.

In the meditation, we breath in and out with the reflection of our ancestors and understand that they are in us, and we are in them. We are the new seeds the parent tree bear, as how the new trees grow from the seeds.

When will I come back to this place again?

It’s not important.

I cannot be stuck in the past and future.

May the living live well and happy, with all their loved ones appreciating each other.

May the departed ones under the light of Nirvana, to be never reborn into the realm of human.

 May all be well and happy!!

When Anat, Physio and Biochem is what we Learn

 

On Day 1, Orientation started.

The MMMC Dean introduced the faculty members.

The only one that captivated my attention is the Anatomy Faculty.

The Head of Department introduced was surprisingly young.

From a Malaysian student perception during school days, usually young teachers are inferior to the older ones in terms of knowledge and experience.

But, it was proven wrong as this does not happen in India.

In this 1 year, I have gone through with lecturer willing to spent their time long after office hours.

The spirit of work-to-serve has definitely inspired me to serve like them, though in another way.

In the afternoon, first class of our academic session begin.

HOD of Physiology came in and I can still remember she asked us to take out our Objective Book and write the word FOCUS on the front page. Initially, it sounded real childish.

She said in medicine, we must keep our goal and focus to be clear every day.

Later on, it remain as an important reminder for my every Block that I should not ever slack because every of the knowledge acquired have equal importance for now and future.

Our first Biochem lecturer started the lesson on amino acid, making me always thought she is the the HOD.

She said, if we spent our time by concentrating on studies, time in India will be flying so fast even without we realise it. Today, I know she is surely right about that.

I would mention one great soul that have play a larger role that besides teaching me Biochem in this 1 year, but also how to be a medical student.

She always said,

“You might escape with last-minute study, mugging everything before the exam, but how will it makes you a better doctor”.

If a medical student make full use of their study life in India, I am very sure, they do not only gain the basic knowledge to save a patient.

We will first learn how doctor should be a human (compassion), then ask this humane doctor to learn to treat his patient as a human like how he would treat for himself (empathy), which then only save him from pain and death (kindness), and if pain and death is still not running away, he must know how to teach the patient how to live with it (self-loving).

The person I am putting the last, but not the least is my Mentor.

Too much of great things a man can do as he has been always there for all other mentees whenever we are TRASHED! Thank you Sir!

My interest to Anatomy, Physiology and Biochemistry so so much would not have arise without all of these people.

Don’t think if I stop here, that is all I can portray about the effort of my lecturers they have put on every student.

The tribute of my teacher can only be paid back from my service.

“Guru kumhar shishya kumbha hai ghadi-ghadi kadhat kot bhitar haat sahar de bahar bahe chot”
Translation: A teacher scolds you for your mistakes but he also supports you to do your best. As a potter who beats the pot on the outer side to give a good shape and design while supporting the pot by putting a hand inside it.

Pray for the best for Pharma, Microb, Patho and Forensic to be Learnt

p.s Decided to have no names and personal photos for protecting privacy

My Secret Success: The 2 Zs

Not around in the cyber world since Uni fever begin…which followed by a short travelling with friends later…

A lot I should have said but I missed it throughout this period.

I just want to start my first piece of writing with a wish…a wish for my friends, Zs

A wish I might not be brave enough to tell it aloud except keeping it here as writing

May my study mate friends who didn’t make it to the end to be bestowed the strength and courage to continue their remaining journey,

You were always there for me every time I felt defeated by examination stress…

My fatigue and saturation of study period is relieve by just hanging out in either one of your room,

Your positive attitude have always made a call to me that it is not the end-of-the-world after all…Just smile =) and things will be alright…

You gave me a lot of peace and calmness.

You guys always make my hazy and tiring road clear and exciting

But now,

I suddenly realise you are not with me together anymore.

I am deeply wondering how it will be without you guys for the next station I am heading to.

Berat mata memandang, berat lagi bahu memikul, I know that absolutely.

I know that nobody can understand the pain you have went through and going to get through except yourself.

But my friends,

Please hold on.

It might be a different journey we are now,

But we are on the same destination of goal

I am sure there will be a time,

When all of us will reach the peak together to fulfil our responsibilities.

Do not count the blessing which we have not gain, But subtract the blessing we have been given, then we will pay gratitude to the life we have.

As iman is your greatest strength, ibadah is your greatest practise, may you be granted the ability not only to get over this Ujian, but also in an amazing and a celebrated way.

p.s People just do not know how much friends actually have made the difference to my academic years in India, a chapter I want it to be forever engraved on my journey of acquiring the art of medicine.

May all be shown the way,

May all be strong.

See Others in Me, See Me in Others

You said you want to save life,

How can you when you do not understand,

That life is just filled of suffering,

Suffering and life is the basic of living.

 

You said you want to relieve suffering,

How can you when you do not understand,

Suffering is the nature of being,

Is by letting go we see suffering ceases.

 

You then now want to let go,

How can you when you do not understand,

Letting go is by letting go of that desire to let go itself,

Is by freeing the mind completely we free ourselves.

 

You have now free yourself,

Then you come to the understanding,

It takes as much as nothing to reach an empty mind,

As much as it takes almost everything to attain that,

As if in an emptiness it is actually full of space, and in a space it is actually full of emptiness.

This is the truth of liberation- Nirvana.

 

You have now empty the mind,

Then you come to the understanding,

An empty mind cannot suffer, and suffering do not arise in an empty mind,

Because an empty mind is a mind of letting go- letting go of the suffering.

 

You have now free yourself from suffering,

Then you come to the understanding,

You have not destroy suffering neither you have deny them,

It is because you have understood suffering that you stay above them,

And so you understood life.

 

A humble dedication to whomever with compassion to life,

The compassion to put life back into others,

We cannot make the sick free from suffering,

But we can make them to understand them- by contemplation,

It is by doing that they gain the freedom to live and be alive.

 

May all be well and happy!

May all be given the strength to brighten others life!

 

“ As a doctor you do not always get to heal, but even so, its fine, just that at least you can care, care for them, it matters.”

 

With metta and compassion from Manipal,

All homage to the Triple Gems for their protection for me and others.

21/05/2012

Only Once, Never Again, to have all of You

 

Life is so short…why wasting time on putting our attention to people and things that do not bring any good to us and others.

6 months…

From 11^th Sept until today, is my fastest pace I have ever went through

The fastest road of life I have ever taken in my life

(Photo credit to Taufiq: A photo taken in India during his tour)

I have learnt so many things and so many people I have know them better.

In this period of time, many hard choices have also been made.

Example, should I just continue this way of life? Is this what I am seeking for in my entire life? Do I just want to pass or to get as many distinctions or something more than that? Should I continue to call someone like these as my friends?

Thankfully, with parents, Dhamma, lecturers and friends, all these questions have been answered and accomplished well too.

Staying in the present…ponder upon the past… wonder about the future

(Another photo credit to Taufiq capturing a mesmerizing photo of another friend, Fakhrul)

I am grateful that by the end of this solid 6 months I am rewarded to have the time with friends and family for 3 weeks back home.

My most productive thing I have did for this 3 weeks will be able to change a person back to his life- as in his real life (regardless is happy or sad, but at least it is real). He controls his life better now. He listens to himself better now.

My memorable time will be also to be able to be back to Shah Alam, INTEC. I just get to meet 2 people though I have travelled so far there. But, I am satisfied very much because at least the 2 person I met is still as healthy as they were.

I went to Shah Alam Buddhist temple. But for this place, I just do not want to comment much. It is a place more I just want to keep it for myself.

I went to IMU. How excited can I be to meet a friend I have not met for a year? The lucky thing is also I have him to bring me around IMU campus, I thought this is once in a lifetime chance. I also met with other INTEC friends, and again just 2 of them. I do not know why, but I prefer to keep my visit a private one, so I did not inform anyone until I reach and whoever I get to meet, I did, whoever I don’t, till next time.

I was also in Nottingham University. I met most of them from INTEC. Memorable time in the Valentine’s Day Night Gathering, people were much sincere and talk anything they want, I thought just seeing them made me felt warm though some of them claimed that I look bored, now and here I just want to tell, I AM NOT! How much I would want to visit all of you again though my mouth have kept saying I am not stepping there anymore, so again, who knows what my heart say?

Back to school- S&D marching Competition

(Photo credit of Harinder Singh)

I was in Penang Free School, particularly for the S&D Marching competition. Wearing shorts and not tucking in, to me is one of the biggest sins a person can do when they attend such a formal event, yet I am forgiven, and is something I really appreciate! I am so sorry, it was so last minute I decided to attend. But I am not only being treated nicely, I am asked to give a speech, I rejected to punish myself for my attire as well as to realise I am just an old man now. But later, when I am asked to give evaluation, I just felt bad enough to say NO again. A very boring evaluation I have given, as I personally feel, tells me I have not entitled to comment on any current issues of Unit 25 anymore. I am seriously a Veteran of the Veterans in this Unit as years coming by.

CNY Potluck Party- my fist gathering once reach Penang

Photo credit of Nimmalan

I have duties with VAD 21 in Thaipusam as well as CNY Potluck, and I met again another few Unit 25 oldies and we discuss a few things. They felt excited to hear from me, but I am sure they did not know I am more excited to tell, after such a long time I did not get to talk with all of them.

Now, at this present moment, I missed all my friends in India. I can’t wait to see all of them. My friends ranged from the bookshop owner, bank officer, hostel wardens, food court food seller and last but of course not the least to me, my classmates!

Do you realise anything different with my writing this time? Interestingly, I just write anything I want today and more prominently, no philosophical articulation. This must be good news for those that have thought my previous posts as boring due to much “weird stuffs”.

 

Whether we like it or not, when the time come, we need to pack and continue with our journey

However, although this separated road we will be walking might be still  far and unsure, let us still put up a smile on our face, to feel so glad that at least on the previous road, we have walk together.

 

Only Once, Never Again, to have all of You

 

Time waits for no man…but it is OK, we can wait for time to come for us. When the time come again, old friends will surely meet again too.

 

 

Till next time,

May all be well and happy!

My Truth? Your Truth? Who has the Real Truth?

 

Realising I have a big load of PBL assignment to read, I chose to sit here to write something.

I realised I have abandoned my blog for a long time, not because I am really that busy, but simply because of I am obeying the Principle of Conservation of Energy which will be:

“Energy is not destroyed or either created, but preserved or converted into other form”.

Why do I say so?

The initial energy when I reach India when I first came here have stopped me from blogging, and this energy or stopping force is not destroyed or disappeared but simply converted into procrastination and giving self-excuses that I cannot do certain things.

As it gets on day after day, it became a common way to carry out my life and so I do not ever question whether am I really that busy to not update this blog.

It just goes on until I have time to made reflection and convert the energy into a kinetic force to move me.

And so I am here….

We do such things many times in life.

For example, we always feel we cannot do certain subject in our studies no matter how hard we try or even to the smallest thing in life such as facing difficulty to talk to a particular person.

Why?

This is what I call the culture of the mind.

When we have to attempt or carry out anything, when condition is suitable and it arises, we put up a perception or we group certain things under certain category.

For example, A is good and so B is bad, A is nice and so B is ugly, A is hard and so B is easy.

Some think the above is longer some think  it is shorter, but mostly that think it is the same

It does not matter what they think, the point is people made different perceptions upon their conditions that had arised

 

That perception will then be kept in our mind, and we hold on to it without even any questions to them.

That perception before even we realise, become a system of belief in us.

That system of belief before we realise again, make us thought it was a truth.

Everyone is seeking for Truth… Everyone claim to have the Best Truth… However, how true is Truth? Are they true?

As we accepted the truth, it became our practise and soon it became part of us- as I will call it as a habit.

And anything that go against that habit will be taken as WRONG and NOT THE TRUTH.

Because of that, we resisted our self from doing things we think we cannot do.

Because of that, we see certain things as truth when they might not be actually.

Because of that, people that do anything that is not align to our truth, we call them disobedient or unknowledgeable.

Because of that, we dislike people, we discriminate people- to whoever we think that have against “our self-perceived truth”.

Therefore, we find this set of judgement within the society among the diverse community.

Therefore, in our daily cultivation, if we are not aware we are developing the resistance to see the real truth by letting the mind to accept the un-truth then sooner or later, our eyes will be filled by the dust even without realising.

What we belief and undertake might not be the real truth, it is just our mind projection.

We see who we are, we are who we see

 

What should I do to prevent that then?

Unlearn, relearn and learn is the ultimate process I must learn.

Belief that nothing is permanent and when the time comes for its cessation, contemplation has to be made, rather than feeling upset and revengeful.

To only do that, we need to let go and hold nothing in life no matter how much we think we need it.

Letting go is not the end of what belong to us…

Letting go is the beginning of our ability to control what we had

 

This includes letting go to what I am saying now.

Whatever I am saying now, you must also let go and do not hold it strongly.

 

Why do I say so?

In Buddhism, it thought us that the Noble Truth is not to have desire.

However, not to have desire is a kind of desire.

Therefore, having no desire by also not having the desire to not have desire is the actual ultimate goal we try to attain.

Same goes to what is happening here, preaching the truth of not holding any truth strongly so we can see the truth is including to let go of this current truth.

If people have always wondered what the Middle Path is, this is what the Middle Path means.

To keep yourself in the Middle Path, trying it too hard even for the Middle Path will make you not in the Middle Path anymore; therefore the real Middle Path is the ultimate stillness of mind or in simple- REAL MIDDLE.

Middle Path

Therefore, practice anything we want in life with simplicity and balance, then we can see this world a simpler and in a more harmony way.

 

Free ourself from perception, free ourself from ideas as how the Great Tao Master had beautifully said to begin Tao Te Ching and how  I will use it to beautifully end my piece:

 

The tao that can be told

is not the eternal Tao

The name that can be named

is not the eternal Name.

The unnamable is the eternally real.

 

Naming is the origin

of all particular things.

Free from desire, you realize the mystery.

Caught in desire, you see only the manifestations.

…

Therefore the Master

acts without doing anything

and teaches without saying anything.

Things arise and she lets them come;

things disappear and she lets them go.

She has but doesn't possess,

acts but doesn't expect.

When her work is done, she forgets it.

That is why it lasts forever.

 

 

May all be well and happy!